Thursday 26 July 2012

I am the Centre of the Universe.

Why is it that everyone thinks that the world revolves around them these days?  Is this the 'sense of entitlement' people speak about?  Lately this is all that I'm seeing.  I'm seeing people demanding attention from others and getting awfully offended when they don't receive the level they think they're entitled to.  It's like their self importance overides reason and logic...like a disease.

I don't understand this concept.  Well...I kinda do...because I did the same thing when I was a teen.  The whole world revolved around me and my problems and I had first world problems and I expected to be accomodated.  But I only felt that way because I was still in the process of learning how the world works.  But now that I'm an adult, I still don't have it all worked out but I do know one thing - I'm merely a speck in the universe!  And this is the truth!

Honestly I'm not that important in the grand scheme of things.  Don't get me wrong, I AM important...I'm important to me, my children, my husband, my family and my God but I don't expect to be MORE important nor do I expect anyone else to think so. 

What is with these unreasonable expectations?  What's reasonable vs unreasonable you ask?  Well it's quite simple I expect to be treated with kindness and respect as a fellow human being THAT IS ALL pretty much.  I expect businesses who provide goods and services to provide those in a respectful manner.  I expect people to do what they say and to apologise when they can't.  I don't expect anymore than I've asked for.  I don't expect people to be mind readers nor do I expect people to treat me BETTER than they would themselves or their family...I expect to fall under themselves and their family as far as importance.  That way I'm not dissapointed when they don't but feel awfully surprised and honoured when they do.  One quote I really love, which was made by Oprah many years ago reads "Blessed are those who expect nothing for they shall never be dissappointed".

I don't understand why some people feel that they are entitled to more than that?  Why would you expect more at the person's or person's family's expense?  Then get upset when they you get it?

Lately this is what I've been seeing.  People feeling really upset and offended that someone hasn't stopped what they're doing for them.  That people haven't bent over backwards and rearranged their lives for them.  Who the hell do they think they are anyway?  The Queen of Sheba?  Today I saw a status from someone about not receiving a text message in due course, when asked how long it's been.....she answered 'an hour'....huh???  Are you kidding me?  Right so the person is meant to answer you in YOUR time frame or they are douchebags?   Forget what kind of person they really are.  Forget that they are kind and loving and doing the best they can with what they've got.  Forget that they may be busy, working, stuck in traffic, stressed or maybe going through some personal crisis or whatever....you didn't text within an hour? - you're a douchebag!  Riiiiiiiight!

These kind of things I've been seeing a lot lately.  He didn't answer the phone, she didn't answer a text....they forgot to pick me up...he doesn't ring me at every second of every day.... They didn't kiss my feet when I entered the room.  Wow first world problems right there!

News Flash! They're HUMAN!!!! 

People have lives guys!!!!  Things pop up!  Other things that may or may not be more important than you at that moment *gasp*.  More important than YOU???? OUTRAGEOUS!!!  LOL  *shakes head* 

Then there are people who insist on making things about them.  Turning everything that is said and done that don't really have anything to do with them...somehow it's turned around to being about them.  That's got to be a talent - seriously.  M is good at this....she can turn anything around to be about her, usually a personal offence of some kind.  Like we all go about our day planning on ways in which we can offend her for that day.   She'll even avoid topics of conversation....she'll say "I don't want to talk about that" or just not engage. Too bad if we do!  Why?   Because it offends her sensibilities too much.  And I'm not talking about grotesque topics of conversation or anything like that....just ordinary conversation...maybe a little provocative but definetly not offensive...but nup...we must all be quiet for her benefit...like she's the centre of the universe.  We need to revolve our conversation around her and her sensibilities <---- I'll delete this stuff about M later, in case she ever stumbles on my blog.  Or I might call her 'M' or something.  No I haven't shared my blog with her for this precise reason...she can make anything about her and I want the freedom to be able to express myself without worrying about offending her in some way.  But if she does happen to stumble on my blog and she reads this...then she's going to make a big deal and be all hurt and cry and be silly...make a scene, even if it's the truth.

This post isn't about her specifically....it's about anyone and everyone who's ever put undue expectations on others and got all upset when they didn't meet them.  M just so happened to come to mind.

And ok....maybe I've been guilty of this from time to time.  But you know what?  At least I'm aware of what I do and try to change it....at least I give myself a swift kick up the backside (figuratively speaking <---(can't believe I have to write that but some people actually do take talk of abuse seriously even when it's not *rolls eyes*) and pull my head in and remember yet again.....

THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND ME!!!!!

Wednesday 25 July 2012

Red Tent Ramblings

I wrote about my experience in the Red Tent months ago...end of last year some time.  I appreciated the concept of it very much and feel that things like this are needed in our society to embrace women, in a society that still struggles to accomodate women in every aspect.  I didn't like the religious feel of it however, but that could just be me based on my personal experiences with religion.  I think a more open and liberal variation of the 'red tent' is what every woman needs.  Somewhere we can go and just get away from everyone and come together with women and just 'be'.

I'm a part of the red tent facebook group and something interesting has come up that brought to my memory a theory I've had about women and their menses.  The article that was referenced in this discussion talked about the possible link with depression and our attitude towards every woman's rite of passage from birth to death and how it has always been surrounded in negativity and unreachable expectations that have caused women to go against their natural grain in the way they think...this plays havoc with the chemical balances of the brain and voila....depression!

This definetly has some merit, however, I was disappointed that it didn't touch on a theory I've always had in that women's menstuation isn't healthy or 'normal' in the true sense of the word.  It has become normal in today's society because it's such a common thing amongst women that it has just become 'normal' but my theory is that it's not normal nor is it healthy to bleed month after month...year after year!

Think about it...you're basically heomorraging from an organ.  It has never made sense to me how this could possibly be normal, but I've accepted it because...well...it's what I've been taught all my life.  Or brainwashed even.

But let's consider something else here for a moment.  We bleed because an egg wasn't fertilised and the lining of the uterus isn't used so it sloughs away - that's the basics.  Ok then!  But this happens every month for every women all over the world since the dawn of time...no...wait....no it hasn't/doesn't!  Let's consider tribal women from the deepest darkest africa.  What about the American Indian?  The Australian Indigenous? (before europeans stepped in and took over).  What about women of ancient times...biblical times...cave man times?  Did they?  Well considering our natural instinct is to reproduce wouldn't it then be logical to assume that all those women of yesteryear spent their childbearing years......actually bearing children?  We don't do it today.  Today we are taught that children are a burden and that we can't just keep having children.  But in the days where there was no contraception...and where sex actually produced a baby, could it be that our ancestors spent their whole lives pregnant and/or breastfeeding?  And by the time they ovulated again...bang pregant!  No period!  From the time they were sexually active (which was young) to the time of menopause they would be pregnant and/or breastfeeding (extended breastfeeding - natures contraception) therefore they simple were not having a period every month for years on end.  They wouldn't be.  The woman's body is created to reproduce..and when women did what their body was made to do...there would never be any need for a period - EVER!  This is basic survival of the species right there!

So this leads me to believe it's not normal at all.  As for health?  Well what would this do to the chemicals of the brain?  The hormones going up and down when they weren't meant to go up and down as often as they do, peaking the way it does.  What would that do?  I say it would play havoc with the seratonin levels in our brains which would then lead to...you guessed it...depression, pms, cramps, mood swings.  This isn't normal!  This is our body telling us there's something wrong!  The body just doesn't misbehave like that without there being something not quite right.

This is a theory that i hadn't really explored properly until now.  It's passed my mind many times but again I've been told that it's normal and healthy to bleed from my uterus...I've been brainwashed into believing that it's something I MUST go through as a woman, because we're the ones with the uterus and we're the ones who have the babies. 

So I went exploring....researching.  And what do I find??  A whole theory based around the concept that menstuation is NOT healthy nor is it normal for a healthy female body.

WOW!!!

Researching further I find a whole other reason behind it.  Forget reproduction for the moment.  Forget that we are meant to be breeding machines...the whole focus in these studies is DIET!!!!

Back in those days...back when all they ate was fresh fruit and vegetable and little or no meat or animal products...apparantly they didn't get periods!  It is assumed that there isn't much ancient writings about menstuation...not because it was taboo but because it really didn't happen all that much.  It has also been suggested that even in bible times whem women were described as 'unclean'...well the word 'unclean' can be translated to mean 'unhealthy' - well....what do you know??  Bleeding from your vagina was the 'issue of blood' and it meant that they were ill...and needed to be kept away from like a leper because..well what if it was contageous?  They didn't know that it wasn't...how could they know?  All they knew is that a perfectly healthy woman was suddenly bleeding out of an orifice and that simply didn't happen all that much.

Huh!

I research further and it's all so technical about toxins and how it affects our blood vessels and how it causes mucous build up and inflamation....BLEEDING....PAIN...etc  And once a month when the lining comes away...instead of being absorbed by our bodies like it's supposed to (and possibly only losing a few drops of blood...hardly noticable) the lining inflames and bleeds copious amounts of blood!  There have been studies in animals - PRIMATES and we are the only primate that this happens to!  The only species that menstuates!  AND other animals have only started menstuating when being fed OUR FOOD....all the toxins and chemicals in it that causes their body to go into protection mode (hence the mucous/blood/inflamation).

Wow!

This is as far as i've gotten in my research so far.  But it seems that  the 'raw' diet is what's responsible for the absence of periods.  Even today healthy vegans are living period free, athletes who's diets are predominently raw foods...are living period free or bleed for shorter periods of time with less blood.  I myself have noticed the difference since i've started my weight loss regime..not only am i less sick (less colds/flus etc) but my periods have become lighter and shorter.  Coincidence?  I think not!

That's not to say i'm going to run out and eat raw...because i love my food and if a monthly period is the price I pay for junk food?... then i gladly pay it.  But i have to wonder what it does to my mind and my health and the rate at which I age.

I'm yet to research further and find out what researchers say about how it would affect depression and how this theory works within my reproduction theory.  But it has certainly given me food for thought and a reason for me not to just 'accept' my uterus heomorraging every month as something normal and inevitable just because we happen to be women.


References - (so far) - http://debbietookrawforlife.blogspot.com.au/2009/04/periods-they-may-be-normal-but-are-they.html

http://www.giveittomeraw.com/profiles/blog/show?id=1407416%3ABlogPost%3A19962

Sunday 22 July 2012

"I was wrong, honey, it does change things...."

Is what Aaron said to me the other night.

Getting married, to me, was just a means to an end really.  I didn't think it was going to change anything and Aaron didn't either.  I just wanted my name changed.  I wanted to share my name with at least some of my children.  I wanted to tick 'married' on the census form and not 'single'.  I wanted to have a party and feel like a princess for the day....and I accomplished all of these.  It wasn't meant to make us feel closer...after all it is merely a piece of paper right?

Aaron and I were both saything to everyone that it wasn't going to change anything.  But it has!  But how?  Nothing's changed except the piece of paper!  We still have the same stresses, we still live together, sleep together....he's still practically living in Brisbane while I'm stuck here being a single mum of 6!  So why is it that we feel different?

We feel closer, more connected....the trust we have for each other has sky-rocketed!  I didn't think that I could possibly love him more...but I so do!!!  He is my everything!  I can't imagine life without him....I feel all 'in-love' and all that!  But nothing has changed except a piece of paper!!!

Not complaining, of course, I'm loving every minute of being 'legally' married...even though I've always viewed us as being married all along...in God's eyes anyway....but making it 'legal' has changed things for the better and I'm excited about exploring this further and I feel very content with 'us' - it's amazing!!!

Friday 13 July 2012

50 Shades of Crap!

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