More Wedding Packages on the Way!

Well I ordered my corset yesterday. A proper one where the bones are steal not plastic. Hopefully it will sit nice under the dress. Needless to say I'll be working on losing a little bit of weight between now and then so I can look my best and the corset doesn't have to do too much work. It's a nice satin one with lace, it's really pretty and perfect for the 'corset style' top of the wedding dress.

Then when I get the corset I'll get my measurements while it's on and then order my wedding dress! Won't be long now!

I ordered my tiara as well...don't know if I'll wear it, it depends on how it looks on with the veil etc...that's what the hair trial is for It didn't cost that much anyway if I don't use it.

Can't wait to get them...I love getting packages in the mail!

Found my Dress

We Mourn Common Sense.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

 

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:-Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm;- Life isn't always fair; - And maybe it was my fault.

 

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies, don't spend more than you can earn and adults, not children, are in charge. His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

 

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

 

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

 

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights,I Want It Now,Someone Else Is To Blame,I'm A Victim.Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, do nothing.

Extravagant vs Simple

Haven't done much more lately, 'cept I've have put another $2000 on our wedding venue.  And I think I've changed my mind on my choice of wedding dress again

Anyway I have a bit of a beef...I'm getting sick of people tell me to keep it 'simple'.  I don't mean that they are dictating to me....nothing like that.  How can I explain?  Well for instance when they share their opinion on something or other they say that they like it because it's 'simple'.  Which is fine and everything but don't people think it's boring??

Take wedding dresses for example...all I ever see is the same old wedding dress...A-line with simple beading and perhaps a little embellishment here and there...you don't see anything extravigant anymore!  I don't mean vulgar either...just something a bit different or a little more fancy.  Something that will cause someone to take a double take and go 'wow...what a dress' instead of 'Oh yes that's nice...seen it before but ya know...it's pretty'.

<---Look at this.

<----- then look at this.

See the difference?  The first one is simple...the second one has that little bit extra.  The first one (or variation of) seems to be what most people choose, very rarely do I see anything different.  Gets a bit boring.

Same with makeup.  I've been ringing around for makeup artists and some of them say that I'd want something 'simple'.  Well no....I don't.  When I wear make up myself it's 'simple' so I may as well do my own make up.  No, what I want is to look different...not like a whore but perhaps like a movie star, with the air brushed look - you know!  That's what I want.

I don't get the 'simple' trend.  I wear simple everyday...jeans and t-shirt!  But I think that on my wedding day I'd want a little bit more than just 'simple'.

I'm too Sexy...

Do you ever prance through your house like a supermodel?  Or is it just me?

When I'm in a particularly good mood and kinda energetic I like to strut through my house like I'm Miranda freaking Kerr!!  Our house is pretty big, it has to be to house 6 kids.  And it has a very loooooong hallway that you almost need a cut lunch every time you want to go to the toilet or whatever.  So it's a perfect catwalk.

I get the momentum going and even think that I could lose some weight doing it...like a whole 1 gram maybe?  Better than nothing!  So every time I strut down my hallway this way and I think I'm so super sexy and I could so  be a supermodel I am brought down to earth as soon as come into the vacinity of .....

....a mirror!!!

Oh God!  What am I doing????  Look at me!

LOOK AT ME!!!!!

I'm a freak!  Man I'm ugly!

UGLY!

And today in particular my face is recovering from a terrible incident involving some 'Gamma Hydroxy' compound that's been shoved in a jar with a very expensive sounding label on it that's suppose to magically make you look younger...that I'm obviously allergic too.  So yeh, My face has felt like it's burning for the last week....it has a couple of discreet dots on it and today it's a litttle on the puffy side.  It's getting better but it's S L O W!.

So of course, saundering past the mirror like I'm the most gorgeous beauty to ever walk the planet, and taking a brief glimpes of my burning face...my shoulders slump and I'm immediately aware of the reality that is my face.

The rest of the day is spend moping around in a depressive state!

I hate Miranda Kerr!

Racism.

Yes an attitude that people really hate and if they don't they should right?  But has anyone ever thought that there may be differing levels of racism?

A - Full on redneck style racism.  They spew hate in every aspect of their lives.  They will go to the extreme of bashing those of differing races either verbally or physically.  They may even have a lot of symbols exhibited in their homes, like swaztikas and rebel flags and things.  They will openly bawlk at interacial marriages and relationships and the like.  And if I were a criminal profiler I would hazard a guess that they are narcissistic who fully believe in their own superirioty in all areas, not just the colour of their skin.  They may hate homosexuals and women too and anything and anybody 'different' to them.  As to them, different means inferior.  An ordinary empathetic person would simply not wish to associate with someone like that.  As their hatred would just ooze from their pores and poison almost every relationship they touch. 

B - Racism based on fear.  Perhaps they've experienced or seen some negitivity with other races and this scares them.  And we all know that fear comes out in a form of anger too so they seem angry at other races.  I don't think they really believe they are superior and they would go so far as to be verbally or physically aggressive but they certain let their opinions known anytime the subject comes up.  They always know someone who knows someone who did this or that and this would then prove that this particular race is bad.  Logic would tell them that not everyone is the same and that you get bad eggs in every race but they won't listen because the emotion that their experiences conjure up is too great.  They can be friends with others because they tend to try and cover their attitude up as best they can as they know it's not socially acceptable.  Generally they can shock people when their real attitudes are revealed and hence may lose credibility as a person.

C - Racism based on logic.  Generally quite logical people who base their beliefs in reality rather than ideals.  They have no problems with other races but can see a real problem with introducing other races into societies who are having difficulties supporting their own.  This seems logical to them and they can't see how this can be classed as 'hatred' or 'superiority'.  It just makes sense that once a cup is full...it's full!  How can you fill it anymore?  So they'll voice this quite a bit in conversations and they generally are well supported in their views.  The media will also confirm their fears for them and they'd feel validated in their beliefs and can't see anything wrong with it really. 

D - Racism based on ignorance.  These are people who are generally lovely people.  They empathise with great many people but when faced with 'logic' they forget their empathy for a moment and readily agree with their logistics.  They'll be the ones who click 'like' on facebook pages or copy and paste statuses...they may even have a bumper sticker on their car.  They'll nod mindlessly and agree with all the logical people, because they make sense to them.  However if one was to point out to them the plight of certain people from certain races...they can actually feel empathy and over time the empathetic in them will be at odds with their logistics  and if nurtured can actually turn them into people who can see both sides of the coin but can no longer bring themselves to agree fully on the logistics of catagory C.

Now I'm sure I haven't covered everyone.  There are others like being racist agains your own race and reverse racism etc etc.  But these are the main ones, I believe, can be defined.

What's really bugging me about people's intolerance against racists is that, although it is a very righteous attitude to have generally, it is somewhat in errant of the fact that not everyone is in the same basket.  This intolerance against racism and bigotry can actually start to look like bigotry on it's own.  When one puts everyone in the same catagory, we then run the risk of looking like the racist who put all races in the same catagory too.  Is this what we want to look like??? 

It's one thing to strongly abhor racism but it's a whole other thing to refuse to separate racism from the racist.  Kind of like loving the sinner but hating the sin.  Now in those who are in Catagory A and B where their racism oozes through every aspect of their lives and lifestyle then no, you really can't separate the sin from the sinner.  They live and they breath it.  But for those in catagory C and D where their racism really isn't based on hatred is it really that abhorant to want to try and be more tolerant and understanding of these people?

Treating them like lepers isn't going to help the situation, I feel.  Being intolerant will only confirm their own  intolerance and ignorance.  A lot can be said for being influential and 'rubbing off' on those who havn't quite looked far enough into why they believe as they do.

I'm sure the lowly housewife who is a lovely down to earth person, who empathise with many a plight and who unthinkingly clicked 'like' on a facebook page, would be devastated if they found out that they've been put in the same basket as Catagory A.  How horrific to find out that they are hated and detested.  And then....to one day think it through and realise they made a mistake in the way they were thinking...and knowing that it's too late that they've already got a reputation of being a racist redneck...:(  How sad!

You know, I don't like racism but I also don't like the self-righteous either.  I feel that they can be just as bad as those that they detest in a lot of ways.  They too seem to ooze hatred and intolerance.  I don't think I would like to be that person either.

So which catagory am I in?  Well I was a cross between catagory C and catagory D.  I'm a realist.  And I see most things logically.  However I'm also a nice down to earth type person who is accepting of most people, as long as you're nice too ;)  However because I mixed with a lot of tolerant people who were able to 'rub off' on me some understanding and empathy I am now no longer a racist.

How cool is that???  Just because someone who detests racism can actually see throught their own self-righteousness and recognise that no...not every racist is the same...that their tolerance was the medicine that I needed to be cured!

Thank God for the REAL understanding, empathetic and tolerant people.  As for the rest of you???  Well, you're not helping the issue...you're hindering.  And as the saying goes..."Evil exists because good people do nothing"...hope you enjoy your time in switzerland, while those at the hand of racists, continue to suffer, because you are too lazy to conjure up enough tolerance to help them.

Shame on you!

#%^$$^&*&^^%

Yeh cos that's all I can think of to title this post,,,,

Anyway update is that Aaron called centrelink and told them everything that I had done and she reckons that I didn't have to do all that and that she doesn't know why I was told to ring the ATO 

Hmmmm yeh.."Hello, I'm left hand and I don't know what the right hand is doing"

So disregard everything I said about centrelink....obviously the first time, I got a dropkick who didn't know what he was talking about 

Reporting to Centrelink...

...that you don't have to put a tax return in.

So today I thought I'd better let centrelink know that I'm not putting in a tax return this year again. Only things have apparantely changed now. Unlike every other year you have to now ring the ATO and get an exemption from there. Ok first time I've heard of it but apparantly this has been the case since 2009. Even though I didn't ring the ATO last year, it still has in my records that I received an exemption. So either the centrelink still took the info from their clients or they got the info from the ATO. Nevertheless, even though I didn't need to do it last year, I had to do it this year.

So then I ring the ATO who almost sent me to go and pick up a tax pack and fill in the exemption form and send it in, but then put me on hold and came back and asked me a few questions and declared that I'm now exempt. Then asks me if I wanted them to let ATO know (I thought I was on the phone to the ATO ) or fill in the form and send it in myself. I said for them to do it...then they proceeded to put me on hold again while they transfer me to someone who can do that for me. (Why couldn't she?)

A guy comes on and instead of merely putting through the exemption and giving me some sort of number (or something...I had no idea what centrelink needed) to give to centrelink, he had a look at my file and it seems I am 'outstanding' (that's the word he used) in my tax returns for the last however many years. Well duh...because I've been exempt because I haven't worked. And the fact that no employer has witheld tax for me didn't give the ATO a hint that I wasn't working.

Apparantly I had to ring them every year and tell THEM I'm exempt (and yet centrelink want me to call them to find out if I'm exempt, but they don't know until I tell them...so why can't I just tell centrelink like every other year ). He then used scare tactics and told me I risk being fined for not putting in a tax return, even though I don't have to WTF???

Meanwhile I ask him several times if he could just give me an exemption number to give to centrelink, to which he played dumb by saying that there isn't any number or anything for me to give me and that he didn't deal with centrelink nor are they linked with centrelink (funny since they somehow miraculously know what my dh's income was for the last financial year...but they're not linked )

So a lot of holding went on with me getting more irate because this was a 13 number and this guy wasn't making sense to me. He then asks if I want him to update my file...which I agreed then had to be put on hold AGAIN for about 5 mins while he does that, because he apparantely needed me sitting on hold while he did it, only to take me off hold and proclaim that it is now done and for me to call the ATO every year, in future.

Then...

He tells me to tell centrelink that a 'return was not necessary' and to quote this receipt number XXXXXXX.

Umm hello?? Didn't I like ask for this several times???

I ended up being rude and saying.....

"THANK YOU!! Now if you had given me that like about 45 mins ago I would have been satisfied and hung up...like this...." Then hung up on him!

Bangs Head Against Wall....over and over...

Most on my fb would know I'm in a real sh!t mood right now but I'm just so over my life right now!

Moving to toowoomba was always the plan and now I'm ready to pack it all in and move back to Brisbane.  I'm so over being a single mum of 6 for a week at a time.  I did not sign up for this, not one bit!!!!  Had I known then what I know now we would never have moved yet, we would have waited until the transfer was certain.

But as it happened we had to move because Aaron's parents were coming back and we were living in their house and they needed their house back.  And the cost of rentals in Brisbane for what we needed was phenominal!!  But now I'm thinking, with the money we spend by him living down there and me living up here, we probably could have done it! 

We were told two things....firstly that Aaron could get a transfer from the Brisbane city watchouse (QLD police) to the Toowoomba watchouse, and I was thinking that it would take from about Sept to Dec to get the transfer....which was fine by me.  But when this seemed dependant upon positions available in Toowoomba, Aaron went and spoke to the Sargent there who told him that they'd be opening a position in Aug/Sept this year and that they'd gladly have him there and that the job was practically his when the time came.

We heard nothing in the mean time, but in June/July Aaron rang the sargent to confirm this position.  The sargent didn't have time to talk to him so asked him to email instead.  Aaron did that and when the first email was ignored, he emailed again...which was also ignored.  It seems to me, like, there is no position and that the sargent has to fob Aaron off because then he'd have to explain himself.

So Aaron goes to HR and finds out ways he could get a transfer on compassionate grounds and he's put in one form already.  Then he speaks to his boss who says he would try to get things moving for him.  Then he speaks to the QLd police COMMISSIONER the big gun!!  Who says that he'd look into it and to send yet another form through HR but really lay it on thick about the need for the transfer!

Meanwhile Aaron's going for other government positions...he's gone for a position for QR National (Queensland Rail) about two months ago and has yet to hear from them.  He's rung them and they're still short listing people so this is going to take months.  He went for another job he didn't get and it's just getting so hard!!!

I'm sick of waiting.  I've been patient for a year! I can't do this anymore!  I don't want to be alone anymore!  It's putting a strain on our family, especially the little kids because Daddy seems to be in and out of their lives and they play up every time he comes home or leaves.  The older kids get used to not having their step dad around then he comes home and throws authority around and the kids look at him like 'You don't live here!!".  And I'm sooooooo lonely!  I'm sick of it just being me doing everything!!!! 

I didn't do the single mum thing very well before....and I'm not doing very well with it now either!!!!  The emotional strain and the isolation and lonliness is driving me insane and I don't know how much longer I can hang on for!!!  Before, at least, there was an end for me to look forward to...Aug/Sept...so I just held onto that!  But now there is no end....no end in sight!!  And I'm facing having to do this indefinetly until something changes!

Uni next year can go down the drain cos although I know that single mums can do it...I'm yet to meet someone who is single with 6 KIDS able to do it on their own.  This is not what I signed up for and It's getting old!!  Very very old!!

If you've read this whole post...then cudos to you...you deserve it.  At least I'm not swearing in this one!!!

And we have a Celebrant!

Celebrant is picked, in the end I got my own way LOL Because he really didn't care as much as he claimed...idiot.

Anyway we have a lovely indian lady who was just lovely. She only does it because she loves weddings so much and she loves steaking beaking at everyone's dresses and things LOL I know she'll be good because this isn't her bread and butter...she does it out of sheer enjoyment.

She can also mix our music for us to stop and start when we like and she does it all, I don't have to nominate anyone to do it for us - which annoyed me about the other lady. All these other extras too which is great and I can't wait to go through her little 'vow' book so we can pick some really cool vows.

Oh oh and we have decided to do the celtic tradition of 'handfasting' (hands together wrapping a cord around the hands). Dh is very proud of his irish heritage so yeh he really wants this.

The celebrant offered the 'sands' ceremony to signify the union of our families (children) but I don't like it because we are already unified so there's no real point.

All in all I'm very happy with our choice of celebants

Paid our venue deposit too so it's now set in stone!

Which Celebrant?? Ugh!!!

So we met up with a few celebrants yesterday and we're have a dilemma. We both have different views on who we like and who we don't like it's awful!

I know what will happen, in the end he'll say that it's my day and I should choose but that's not what I want. I want us both to like her and to be excited about it grrrrrr. I think we'll have to sit down and list pros and cons on them all.

One issue I have is that one of the ladies who we both didn't like has actually gone out of her way and thought about our ceremony and written a mock up one already and includes a very personal but funny reading about us and everything. This is one we thought wasn't all that good, but she's going above and beyond and everything and we haven't even chosen her yet.

Then one that we both liked doesn't do music, which means I'm going to have to nominate someone to do stop and start the music and stuff, otherwise we have to pay her an extra $50 for her to get someone to do it for us...huh?

I don't know...

The Things People do to get your Business.

So a couple of weeks ago we met up with the functions co-ordinator at Burke and Wills motel to look at using one of their function rooms. It all seemed nice and everything even though we didn't choose it...it's all good. Anyway chatting to the lady and telling her that we hadn't looked for a celebrant yet and she tells us that they're all booked out and that one bride had to get one from Sydney for $2000.

Anyway so I'm panicing by this stage thinking how hard it's going to be to find one yadda yadda. But Aaron, being the smart guy that he is, reckoned that she was lying to us trying to get us to use her 'prefered' celebrant (especially if we used their venue).

Well it turned out he was right. I started searching yesterday and everyone that I emailed got back to me within 1/2 hour and told me that they were available for the 18 of Feb...and I even got a few phone calls. So basically I can choose!!!

*shakes head* why do people lie? Like seriously? Did she think we wouldn't find out that she had us going? So glad we didn't pick their venue now!

We have a Date!!!

Well got an email back from Highfields and there are no spaces for march or april So 18th of Feb it is!!!

We have a date!!!!

Ebay is my Friend!

Well been doing research on ebay for invitations and bombonieres and...I reckon I can make my own invites including getting inserts printed for around $50something. And I can get Bom's with stickers with guest names on them for $50 something as well! How awesome is that!!!!

Ebay is my friend

Looking for hair accessories atm...veils and things. Have no idea how to have my hair.

And it's about Time!!!

Yes after being together for 5 and a half years and two children, we're finally tying the knot!!

Ok the date is going to be 18th of Feb. 2012. However we might change this depending if the venue has the space in March or April. It's going to be so hot in Feb!!! But if we can't change it then 18th Feb it is!

We've chosen our venue at Highfields Cutlural Centre - we love it because of the lighting effects that they have and the fact that we can get married outside and the guests don't have to go anywhere! We can go off and get a few photos and the guests can mingle around a lovely outdoor area having canapés and drinks before being ushered into the reception area.

My colour is going to be pale pink - love pink! I'm having my children in the bridal party and Aaron's having his brother as his best man.

I've ordered and paid for the girl's bridesmaid dresses $156.95 altogether from Dino's direct custom made. Bought Cassidy's flowergirl dress for $50 bargain!

Photography is going to be free as my cousin's going to do it - yay

A friend's going to do the cake at around $150

And am looking online ATM for invitations and bomboneires! I've found some plastic boxes that you could put ribbon around and they come with a sticker with the guest's name on it for free. So technically I could get the bom's and the place cards for one price...but still shopping because I think I can get them separate for cheaper still.

I think I'm going to make my own invites so looking on ebay atm for supplies for that...cheap as.

Next port of call is to find a celebrant!

The Wedding Plans Continue.

I haven't written anything for a little while but that doesn't mean I haven't been writing.  I have, I've been writing about our wedding plans etc, which, ironically, have exploded into something bigger than what we've planned...funny as!  But we figure we may as well just do it one time and properly, with all the bells and whistles rather than having a second rate BBQ then doing the whole wedding thing later.  He's gotten a pay rise so we reckon we can make it so...

Anyway, the next few posts are from another forum I frequent, with all the updates of the wedding and a few other things.

I haven 't been slack...honest! :)